It's complicated and beautiful

Quite some time ago I decided I wanted to have a blog. The complications began right away and they are telling of my story: should I do it in English, which is the language of my professional world and that of many good friends of mine? Should I do it in French, my daily language at home and with my children? Or do I want to do it in German, the language of my parents, siblings, community and many more friends? I live with several worlds, perhaps in between, sometimes at the margins, often in overlap, and it's always a little complicated. 

I've come to see this complication as beautiful although it's at times a pain. It's not about grammar and words, or rarely; it's about cultures and perspectives, experiences, stories and ways of life - and mostly ways of communicating. 

I grew up German speaking in a predominantly French environment. When I visited my cousins in the German speaking part of the country, I was amazed to hear perfect strangers talk in German to their children. I grew up with a sense of belonging to a minority and it took me about 30 years to realize that sense had become a part of who I am, wherever I went and whatever I did. I was never completely and perfectly "one of them". And that betrays me, doesn't it: "them". So in a way my aspiration always oscillates around wanting to be one of them and at the same time wanting to be different from them. 

Learning to see and feel complexity - diversity - as beautiful and dignified is a long journey.  Not being afraid of it, outside and within, that's part of coming to be at peace. Identity can be pluralistic, manyfold, diverse. Perhaps that's why I was drawn early on into peacemaking....